Like Cats and Dogs

The kids have been extra cute lately. KM has been so helpful with QM and playing with her, and carrying her around. Taking dangerous things from her and giving her more appropriate toys. But they fight. Well, he tries to play and she fights. She pulls his hair, and he cries. She crawls over to him, then crawls on him trying to get what he has. If her tries to help her, or move her or protect her, she screams. She throws her fists down to the floor, sits up a little straighter and she screams. She yells at him and makes lots of noise. You know it's completely directed at him because she stares at him the whole time she's yelling. If he moves, she turns her head to yell at him some more. She is really starting to communicate her dislike.

They do play very well together too. He will help her walk, and she will crawl everywhere he goes. He shares his toys and will even help pick up after her. If he is on the bed, she wants to be on the bed, but also, he WANTS her to be on the bed. They are such great friends, and I hope it stays this way. I know they will have their fights, but I want them to like each other.

KM has been a little sensitive lately. "You love QM more than me. You don't love me." He thinks we play with her more and love her more. So I told him that we would have a special date, just me, him and daddy. We would all go golfing. But that too was the wrong answer. I told him that we'd take him golfing and QM would stay at Amma's. "BUT I'LL MISS MY SISTER," he howled/cried. Can't win for losing. (To be honest, I have no idea what this term means. I looked it up here and I still don't think it makes any sense, but am leaving it anyway.) We did end up going golfing and had a great time. He didn't even miss his sister (at least not that we heard about.)

It was such a busy weekend, but we did have some time for fun. Saturday we did some chores around the house. Husband did some yard work (mowing weed whipping etc.) I cleaned the highchair, car seat and 2 strollers. Washed them on the deck and washed the straps and covers in the washer. They were in really bad shape and needed an overhaul. After that was all done we took a nap, then Husband and I went grocery shopping while Amma (oh, lovely Amma, how I love you let me count the ways..) watched the Monkey's. $210.00 later, we left the grocery store. BLAST. Then we went home and made a feast (at 8:00 at night). We made ribs on the grill, corn on the cob -- OK really that was all we made, but it was DELICIOUS! Then we cleaned up dinner and watched Swing Vote and Valkyrie. Swing Vote was much better than Valkyrie.

Sunday, we got up and Husband and I went to Great Clips to get our hair cut. Normally we don't go there. But we were desperate. We both needed a hair cut really bad. Then we stopped and got some hair dye for Amma, went home and did her up good. :o) Then Amma and KM left and Husband, QM and I took a nap. It was really nice. After nap time we got ready quick and went to a graduation party. Met Amma and KM there. She took the kids home and Husband and I stayed to have some more beers and we ended up going out with some of my cousins. It was very good times.

Monday, we got up early thanks to Husband being a pest. We took a trip home for showers and golf clubs then picked up KM and met my cousins at the golf course. We had a great time. It was a bit on the windy side, but warm and good to be outside, working off our hangover. KM is a pretty good golfer. When he makes contact he can really hit the ball. I think he likes the driver (the screwer, screwer) the best. He was very patient and listened very well to all the golf rules I was trying to teach him. One little melt down, he threw his club and ball on the ground and said "I QUIT." He was mad that daddy had driven the cart without him. I got that settled down and promised that he could drive next time and the rest of the day went beautifully.

I like weekends like this one. We did a lot as a family and had a great time. Sometimes I feel like we are all going in different directions and don't spend much time together. This was one of those weekends that restores the faith I have in our family. The kind of weekend that reminds you that you have it pretty good and that you wouldn't want it any other way. Even with the Pink One and the Blue One fight like cats and dogs.

You thought my house was clean before!

So we had a showing a few weeks ago. Their realtor thought our house was "cluttered". It may have been a bit, but we weren't expecting showings for at least another week from the day she came and we only had a few hours notice. Husband ran home, picked up best he could and we waited. She told her client about our house and said she'd get back to us. That was a Tuesday. On Thursday afternoon we found out that HE (the potential) homeowner was flying up from Arizona to look at our house. DE-CLUTTER TO THE HILT we were told. So I called in for reinforcements. MOM, if I ever had any favors with you I NEED TO USE THEM ALL RIGHT NOW. She came after work on Thursday and stayed the night. Her and Husband cleaned and cleaned and organized and de-cluttered all day on Friday. I got home about 7 after dropping off the Monkey's and working, and got to work on the house doing my fair share. Mom and I were up til 3 am. Then back up again at 8.30 to be sure we had it all done before 11.30 when he was getting there.

We left our house in search of something to do. We stopped at a friends and had a beer, then went to my mom's house so she could change clothes. Remember, she'd been at our place since Thursday after work with no change of clothes. Then we went to get something to eat then back home. We waited and waited and waited and waited. I went to get Queen Monkey from Gupa's house, and came back. Then our realtor came over to pick up some paperwork. We finally got an email from their realtor. They didn't think our lot was the size we said (the size the SURVEYOR said), they liked the craftsmanship, but whatever, they weren't putting in an offer. SAD.

Since then we had one more showing, yesterday. I was home with the kids so it worked out okay. Queen Monkey has a case of Pink Eye. Since we didn't start the drops till Tuesday around 7 pm, we weren't allowed to daycare until today. It was actually really nice. It was a nice day out yesterday. I had plenty of time to pick up the house while QM napped and KM watched a movie. No rushing around. I packed up a bag and off to the park we went. We had to be gone from 3-4 pm for the showing. We we got back from the park and our walk, there was no card left at our house. I'm not even sure if they ever did come to look at it.

It really hasn't been that hard to keep the house clean since the MAJOR.OVERHAUL.OF.2009. We have been picking up more after ourselves since we never know when we'll have a showing and it's easier for Husband to do a quick run thru than to clean the whole house. The basement rarely sees the light of day so usually it's only a few rooms that need attention. It's also sort of forced us in to better habits, of doing the dishes every night, and keeping the rooms much cleaner than usual.

Other major happenings over the past few weeks:

QM has learned to sit up by herself
Then she learned how to crawl (it's so mechanical and cute, she looks like one of those baby dolls you buy in a store. It's so very rigid.)
Then she learned to pull her self up to standing by the furniture
Then she learned to crawl up the step from the sunken living room into the entry way or the kitchen (Time for the baby gate.)
Now she follows us around the house where ever we go, she crawls and whines (just a little bit, a sorry, pitiful whine that says, Stop and Wait for ME! Boo Hoo Hoo, hoo hoo hoo. It's actually kind of sweet in it's saddness.)

So until the house sells we are in a Hurry Up and Wait situation and I.HATE.THAT.

Feeling Left Out

This morning King Monkey woke up and told me about the dream he had. He said that we had went to the neighbors to give him the wooden ladder and he was sad because we wouldn't let him come with us. I told him it was just a dream and that if we went to the neighbors we would let him come with. He said "Thank you mommy."

The night before he had a similar dream, and I don't remember what it was about, but he was feeling left out in that one too. I guess we need to spend a bit more time with him, alone, just him. I thought we had been spending a fair amount of time with him. I thought we were doing things with him alone. I thought we were not ignoring him. I thought we were making a point of treating him special. I guess it's not enough. We need to bring our A game to parenting.

We took the kids and Amma to a waterpark last weekend for Thanksgiving. We spent the whole weekend with him. We played in the water. We sat in the hot tub. Only after he went to bed, or was down for watching cartoons, did Husband and I go and do something else.

I love that he is old enough and smart enough to tell us what he needs. To tell us "hey fuckers, member me? I love you too." He doesn't just pitch bucky fits, he tells us what's wrong. He talks to us. And I can always tell when he needs more love, because he asks to sit on my lap. Or he'll say in a very sad voice, "I love you."

I guess he needs more mom and dad time. I think we'll spend this weekend decorating for Christmas and putting up the tree. I'll try to make some memories, good ones instead of bad dreams.

We're all a bunch of goonies

• She doesn't like to touch her own hair once it has fallen out of her head. It makes her gag.


• It drives him crazy if they forgot to deliver his mail.


• She doesn't like sharing a hand towel with her younger brother, but her husband is okay.


• He talks in terms of days, "I can't wait for 7-10 days until my credit card gets here!", "Has it been 7-10 days?"


• She will clean her bathroom once a week.


• He won't put his hands in the dirt, and doesn't like it when they have anything on them.


• She doesn't like to shower because she doesn't like wet hair.


• He'll shower a few times a day sometimes.


• She doesn't mind doing laundry, but hates putting the clothes away.


• She would rather load the dishwasher than unload it.


• He will be your best friend until he is threatened by you, then you are the dumbest person alive. You couldn't possibly know as much as he does.
• She will never call you unless you have called her first.
• He will complain about his steak because "it's not like I make at home."

(Writing style borrowed from Stephanie. If she wants me to remove this post, I'd be glad to.)

Phone Calls and Memories

This morning I got a most unusual message on my phone, I guess not really considering the source. It was pretty much par for the course from her. It was from my friend/cousin. It was a message playing "My Town" -- Montgomery Gentry. This is one of my favorite things to send and receive. A song, between us, that is special to us, and only "us" knows why this song means anything, and every time we hear this song we think of each other. The "us" could have more than one song or only one song. But I love that no matter where we are, or what we are doing, we stop for a moment, re-connect and go back in time, to the time when that song turned from just any old song, to OUR song.

The particular song takes me back to the summer I was going to get married and my friend/cousin and I would pick up a six pack of Busch Lite and drive the hour and half from where we lived in the cities, to my home town. We would do this more than once a week and usually on a week night, where the next day we had to be back in the cities to work, at a very early hour. It makes me think of the windows down, sun shining, wind blowing, radio cranked up, stuck in traffic. And as soon as I think of how the windows were down, it reminds me of another memory, my husband who decided that our home town was "His Town", so when the song came on for him he would roll down the windows and drive around "His Town". He had to "make the rounds" as he called it, to check on "His Town". This is exactly why we would roll down the windows when ever we heard this song.

I love that forever, whenever I hear that song, I will think of here and she will think of me. I miss the days when we young, and wild and free, and usually drunk! Life was so much simpler back then (all 4 years ago). We did what ever we wanted and on weekends were usually a 6 pack in by Noon. I distinctly remember, shoes off, sun shining down on us, slight wind blowing, and we were ankle deep in the only mud puddle we could find. It couldn't have been more than 5 sq ft big. But it was enough to get our toes dirty.

Time will never be like that again, but I will always treasure the memories we made driving down the road, and it makes me look forward to the road trips of the future.

New car you say --- It's yours!

Kermit, I know you are only 23 months and 15 days, but if you want a new car, it's yours. Or a new toy, or a trip to Disney World, ALL YOURS. Actually anything you can think of, you can have it. After last night, I am at your service and forever will be. On the ride home last night, out of no where and with no prompting from me, you blurted out from the back seat, "I wuv you mommy." For no other apparent reason, than you actually do "Wuv Me". You also said it to daddy when we got home. But when I asked you to repeat it to daddy later on, you just kept saying that you "Wuv Mommy". Which means that, you can have anything, whatever it is that your little heart desires, it's all yours. And from what I can gather all that you want is to "Pay Choo Choo's" with me when we get home. You asked and asked on the way to daycare today. You also asked for a tubby on the way home last night. Which I think is great, because it must remind you of Amma, because every time you are with her for more than a minute, she gives you a tubby. She just love, love, LOVES the way you smell after bath time. Like a little tiny baby, even though you are now almost 2, it makes her think of 2 years ago when you were so small and so new and so very much the first grandchild. She also will forever be at your service, because when asked "Who's baby are you?" The most common reply is "Amma's Bebe". Followed quickly by a "My Bebe" because you think we are talking about your blanket. So very protective of you blanket you are. You actually hit the girls at daycare who DARE to touch your blanket. It and you have been given many time outs over it. But it's yours and you understand that. You are also starting to understand what a "Time Out" is. You are so very smart and because of that, we know you are ours.

I love you, Baby!

Love, Mommy.

Drugs!

Brought up on Drugs

The other day, someone at a store in our town read that a
methamphetamine lab had been found in an old farmhouse in the adjoining
county and he asked me a rhetorical question, "Why didn't we have drug
problems when you and I were growing up?"
I replied: I had a drug problem when I was young. I was drug to church
on Sunday morning. I was drug to church for weddings and funerals.

I was drug to family reunions and community socials no matter the weather.
I was drug by my ears when I was disrespectful to adults.
I was also drug to the woodshed when I disobeyed my parents, told a lie,
brought home a bad report card, did not speak with respect, spoke ill of
the teacher or the preacher, or if I didn't put forth my best effort in
everything that was asked of me.
I was drug to the kitchen sink to have my mouth washed out with soap if
I uttered a profane four letter word.
I was drug out to pull weeds in Mom's garden and flower beds and
cockle burs out of Dad's fields.
I was drug to the homes of family, friends, and neighbors to help out
some poor soul who had no one to mow the yard, repair the clothesline,
or chop some firewood, and if my mother had ever known that I took a
single dime for this kindness, she would have drug me back to the woodshed.
Those drugs are still in my veins; and they affect my behavior in
everything I do, say, and think. They are stronger than cocaine, crack,
or heroin: and, if today's children had this kind of drug problem,
America would be a better place.
Author unknown

AMEN!


(On a side note -- I don't know who wrote this, but if they want credit, let me know and I will get there name posted here. I also believe every word of this and that the world would be a different place if we had more "drugs".)

Moving Day

My cousin and I have a standing tradition that every year we celabrate "Moving Day". I started in 2002, when I was exiled out of the state of California by an ex-boyfriend. This guy was a real peach. I was told one weekend, "you need to move back to MN, your family misses you and we should leave on Friday." This was after I had found him, dirty dancing with a disgusting ho, to which he replys, he was helping our roommate "get some". Too much energy was already wasted on him in this post, if you want more details, ask me.

Anyways, back to Moving Day.... We started this tradition the day I got back in to MN, we picked up some alcohol and went home and got drunk. Moving Day was more of a moving on with your life and the changes that come, than it was about actually moving. But it seems almost every year since, one of us has actually moved. The first year was 2002, back from CA. The second year 2003, I was engaged, planning a wedding, building a new house and living in the city. So we celebrated by drinking heavily (my cousin and I). The third year 2004, my cousin was moving to MT to take a new job, moving day was celebrated about a month later than normal in May of that year, {Moving Day is actually April 26}. We had moved her out of her apartment and then took a road trip with her dad to MT. The fourth year 2005 was marked by us chatting on the phone and reminising over times past. We would recount all the stupid and fun things we have done on Moving Day, and how much our lives have actually changed since that fateful, wintery April night when I showed up on her door step crying. Since we weren't together on moving day, we had to celebrate separately. But then in the Fall of 2005 we got to do it right, she moved back from MT for the winter. We drove half way across the country once more together. Then in the Spring of 2006 (Aprilish) we got to pack up once more and move her back to MT, for the 6th moving day, this trip happend to coincide with the original day. Each time we would grab a 6 pack and drive (this was a Moving Day tradition and only one was missed when we weren't together). We even have a theme song. Jessica Andrews, There's More To Me Than You. Check it out, this is the exact thoughts I had on the first Moving Day, but the sound track wasn't discovered until the 2nd.

So this year, was once again marked with us being on opposite sides of the US. She is still in MT and I am here in MN. I did call her at a very early time and sing almost the entire song on her voicemail, which I knew would get big laughs, mostly because I am a HORRIBLE singer.

We moved Saturday into our new house, it was a beautiful day and plenty of beer was drank, but it just wasn't the same without her. Sometimes, I feel like my life is moving on with out her and other times I feel like she is moving on with out me. We always end up in the same places, just every once in a while, one of us is left behind for a few months. It's not a competition. But when she moved out to MT for the first time, I was jealous. It was so beautiful out there. She made all these great new friends, and here I was in MN doing the same old things I used to. I was married and settled down. I sometimes wanted to be free to run. Other times, (like this year) I am very happy to be settled down and I know she is a little jealous. She loves my husband ( I do too, :) ), but I know she wants what we have. We have a wonderful son and good jobs, but every now and then, I would like to pick up and move, just to see what it would be like somewhere else. That's the trouble with life, you are always wanting something more, something different, something new, something you can't have, something on the other side of the fence. The grass is always greener....