Mother of the Year -- Not Me

This morning I yelled at KM. I mean really lost my temper and yelled at him. To be honest, I was provoked. We were driving to day care, and out of no where, he whips his sippy cup at me. With out even thinking, I turned around and yelled "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?" Then I slapped his hand and told him that he was going to get a spanking. And you know what he did? He didn't cry or laugh or seem scared at all, he made this GRRRing sound.

Which this just proves to me, that I am in fact (and going to admit it here) a bad mother. I'm the mother who yells at their kid too much, so much in fact that when I do yell, it doesn't even phase him. I have been short on patience lately and taking it out on him. I know, I should not be doing that. I have tried, walked away when he gets my blood boiling because he will not get out of bed. Instead of yelling, I tried going to the kitchen to get his milk so it would be ready. Then I come back and he still will not get out of bed, so I go and put my shoes on and he will still not get out of bed. Then I spend some time getting his clothes together and yet still he will NOT GET OUT OF BED. I usually try to wake him up slowly, so he has time to get going in the morning with out having to hit the ground running, but he does it to test me. I know what he's doing and it's driving me crazy. The only thing that will get him out of bed is for me to pretend that I'm leaving with out him. I'll admit, I've done this a few times and I'm not proud of it. I don't want him to ever think that I would leave him behind. But desperate times call for desperate measures I guess. I have been racking my brain for a better way but nothing. So until I can come up with something better, I guess I'll have to keep pretending that I will leave him behind. Nothing like adding to the damage that I have already done.

Bad Day

Husband and I just can not get on the same page this last week. He has been the grouchiest I have ever seen him. He somehow doesn't really think there is anything wrong with his behavior. I on the other hand have stopped talking to him because of it. I have also stopped sleeping with him because of it. If you want to be that grouchy and mean, then I will have nothing to do with you until you apologize for being so grouchy and mean. Our computer crashed and this apparently is a reason to act like a teething 1 year old.

We can't even talk to each other. Last night I was trying to help him fix what I could on the computer and it escalated in to us getting a divorce. Yes I said divorce over a computer. No I don't think we will actually get divorced, but when he gets mad and angry and pouty and stompy feet, he throws out the d-word. I used to scare me, thinking that we would actually get divorced because we couldn't agree on what to watch on TV. But now I know I can call his bluff and ignore him. He hates this. So he called me this morning, looking for a favor, still didn't apologize for his crabbiness, but he had to call me. This is a step in the right direction, which is to see things my way.

Our friends came over on Friday night for my birthday. All of us went to eat except for Husband and the guy that works for him. They stayed home. All of the friends also noticed how unbearable he was. Which frankly, made me feel a whole lot better. At least I wasn't the only one to see it. I don't understand him, and I really don't care to at this point in the fight. All I want is for him to say "I'm sorry I was an ASS, a major ASS." Then we can get back on with our lives.

Lots Of Things About Me

1. I love the way a new box of Crayola Crayons smells.
2. I don't like rice crispys bars or marshmellows.
3. I waited until I was 18 years old to have sex for the first time.
4. I HATE tuna fish. I once threw up an entire can of it in Perkins, and haven't eaten it since. I was 6 at the time.
5. I love all 80's music.
6. I once spent 2 weeks trying to find the $0.05 mistake in my checkbook so that it would balance.
7. I love to cook but hate to do the dishes.
8. My husband proposed to me while driving down the road, smoking a cigarette.
9. I love red roses and lilacs.
10. I believe in fate & karma. Things happen for a reason.
11. I only drink ice tea in the summer months. It's summer drink.
12. I love to watch baseball and football. I'd rather watch them on TV, at home on the couch than in person.
13. The first time I ever got drunk was at a neighbor's graduation party. It was the summer before I went in to 8th grade. My dad took me home passed out.
14. I HATE when girls refer to their guy at "Mr. Big". There is only 1 Mr. Big and he was on Sex in the City.
15. I've had my license suspended for too many speeding tickets.
16. I owned my first home at 21.
17. I own chaps and wore them in Sturgis.
18. I have 5 brothers and 1 sister. My youngest brother is 1.5 years younger than my son.
19. I grew up on a farm and don't know how to drive a tractor, but know how to bail hay.
20. I used to clean new construction houses as a job in high school.
21. I have been to Mexico deep sea fishing and caught some Yellow Fin.
22. I moved to California when I was 19 for 4 months.
23. I have moved 10 times in 7 years.
24. I don't eat leftovers but will put them in the fridge anyways, just so I can throw them out later.
25. I used to mark my sox with nail polish so they were easy to match up when clean.
26. I like to drink my Morgan with Diet Coke, but will usually drink Diet Pepsi, if there is no Morgan in it.
27. I once sold all my Cd's and bought all Christian one to replace them.
28. I am a 34B.
29. I used to crash weddings in high school for something to do on weekends, so I could dance.
30. I am the calm one in a crisis.
31. I have met Chi Chi Rodriguez and have his autograph. He's very funny.
32. I love to scrapbook, but hardly ever do.
33. I will drive across country to move a family member and have done it several times. I LOVE A ROAD TRIP!
34. I have never broken a bone and my only stitches were for my C-section.
35. My parents got divorced when I was 8.
36. I love Chinese food.
37. Things I'm good at -- being a mom, organizing, budgeting, scrap booking, doing laundry, cooking and baking, balancing a checkbook.
38. I will drunkenly call you over and over and over again until you shut your phone off in the middle of the night, at which point I will keep calling and leaving you random songs on your voicemail. Because at 3 am I am a REALLY good singer.

Is it time for a new picture...

I have been hesitant to put up pictures of myself or of KM on this site. I don't really know why. Sites like Dooce.com and Greek Tragedy.com do it all the time. I suppose I have some sick fear of someone finding me, and then killing me based off a picture I put up of KM in his Halloween costume. Seems strange I know. But then I also think of the sites listed about. They are doing fantastically well as far as readers, and from what I can tell they make a decent living with it too. Is this because the people who read their sites feel like the know them, because they have seen their faces? Do they want to come back every day to look at their faces? Do they want to read more because they have seen their faces? The world may never know. But I am thinking it may be time to come out of hiding. So if I can figure out a good way to post some pictures here (and by good, I mean easy), I will do it.

Update: As you can see, I caved. Enjoy!

Day 8, Post 6

So I'm a little behind on this blogging thing for the NaBloPoMo. I'm a rookie and am not used to this rigorous schedule of blogging EVERY DAY. The computer fiasco of 2007 is somewhat behind us. We now have an external hard drive, have all of KM's baby pictures and are getting a new computer. The only thing we are still missing is the information on Quickbooks, but hopefully if we re-install the software it will come back. It looks like all the files are there, we just can't get to them until we re-install.

Go over to my NaBloPoMo page and check it out. Leave me a loving message. And what's the most fun of all this for me is that over there I tell you to come back here. It's like one of those blonde jokes, how do you keep a blonde busy all day? Give them a card that says "see other side" on both sides. ha ha ha ha ha

Now that you've heard the dumbest joke of the day... go over and check it out.

Doughnuts

This morning KM took it upon himself to take the doughnuts out from under the desk at daycare and carry them downstairs under his chubby little arm, open them up and eat them. In his defense, he was not the only kid to do so. He had 2 accomplices. They each carried one package. If you're keeping track, that's 3 kids and 3 packages of doughnuts.





They thought it was SO VERY funny. They were laughing and giggling and carrying on as 2 and 3 year olds do. All of a sudden, Wickty (my day care lady/aunt) heard them and they were saying "doughnuts, doughnuts". This is not normally a word they say a lot. She went to investigate, and sure enough the little shits were knee deep in doughnuts.





I don't know how many they got down before she found them, but I'm going to guess at least 2 apiece. This is also not the first time she has found them huddled together eating things they should not be eating. On his last 2 (and first 2) birthdays -- I brought cupcakes to Wickty's house to share. The first year they only made a mess at the table because they were really to small to eat them carefully. But on his 2nd birthday, they (and I don't remember which they's exactly) managed to get them off the counter, and under Dabid's desk and half eaten before Wickty found them. MESSY! Frosting everywhere, and believe me I got a phone call about it. I told her she should have been watching him more closely.



NoBloMoPo -- Day 7

Posts -- 5

I'll try to catch up with 2 extra posts.

BIRTHDAY Update

It has been a good day....



Free coffee this morning (Thanks Caribou!)

Lots of calls to wish me a "happy to you day"

Lunch with friends (who bought!)

Lots of laughs over a work thing -- it would take a long time to write, but it was really funny!

Leaving work early

Dinner with friends tonight.



I'm glad everything fell into place on a day all about me!